On Fatherhood

Another article I wrote for the Brotherhood of St. Andrew a number of years ago. I think it still holds.

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This year Father’s Day fell on Trinity Sunday. I joked with my parish during the sermon that I was grateful because it gave me an excuse to focus on one Person of the Trinity, and not to try to explain that mystery again!

As I prepared my sermon I spent a lot of time asking myself the question, “Why did the first Person of the Trinity choose to be called “Father?” The more I thought about it, the more uncomfortable I became with the only answer that makes any sense.

It surely isn’t because God intended to raise up men/fathers as more important or more worthy of leadership. It surely wasn’t because God is somehow more masculine than feminine. That just doesn’t fly. When God created humankind, He created them “male and female in His image.” Attributes of motherhood are just as much a part of the Godhead as attributes of fatherhood. The first Adam wasn’t a man, he was an “earth creature” (“Adam” comes from the word for dirt.) In that creature were both male and female, and from that creature male and female were separated. 

“But wait!” some may say. “The woman was created as a helper, not a leader!”

Let’s look briefly, at what that word helper means. I can tell you one thing. It doesn’t refer to that guy who walks around your house behind the plumber grabbing his tools for him. Let me show you some places where the same Hebrew word is used in Scripture.

and the name of the other, Eliezer (for he said, “The God of my father was my help, and delivered me from the sword of Pharaoh”). (Exodus 18:4 ESV) (“Help – refers to God.)

And this he said of Judah: “Hear, O LORD, the voice of Judah, and bring him in to his people. With your hands contend for him, and be a help against his adversaries.” (Deuteronomy 33:7 ESV) (Again, “help” refers to God.)

One more… Our soul waits for the LORD; he is our help and our shield. (Psalm 33:20 ESV)

You get the picture. In every other case of the of the word “ezer” (the word for help or helper) in Hebrew, it refers to God.

So God as Father has nothing to do with somehow elevating men over women. Indeed, we can see from elsewhere in Genesis that the ascendance of men over women is a result of sin, not of God.

To the woman he said,“I will surely multiply your pain in childbearing;in pain you shall bring forth children.Your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you.” (Genesis 3:16 ESV)

This isn’t a commandment, it’s a description of the relationship between man and woman in a world broken by sin. The man’s “ruling over” his wife isn’t what God intended. It isn’t the way things were in the Garden. It’s a consequence of humans choosing their own way over God’s.

So, then why did God come as a man? Why did Jesus call God “Father?”

This is what I believe.

God came as Father because that’s what most needed fixing. He came as Father because it was more important to start off by fixing fatherhood among us than to fix motherhood. 

Yes, we have leadership role to play, but our leadership must be modeled on leadership as exemplified by Jesus, who came, “Not to be served, but to serve.” If we want a clear image of what God means when God says “Father” we have no farther to look than Jesus who said of Himself, “If you have seen me, you have seen the Father.” (John 14:9) 

We lead our families, our churches, our communities not by assuming power, but by assuming servanthood. That’s how God did it. I’m not inclined to argue.